The Fretful Mother's Blog

Laundry is a never-ending chore, unless you are a nudist. As soon as you wash, dry and fold all the clothes from the hamper, you realize you are just wearing more clothes that will need to be cleaned. The job is never complete. As part of this realization, I’ve taken to limiting my laundry tasks to once a week or whenever the children run out of socks. (more…)

I’m just returning from a trip to Atlanta, where precipitation is apparently cause for panic. The forecasters kept saying they’d get 1 to 2 inches of snow, which I thought would be no big deal. No need to stock up on bread, milk and pop-tarts. Unfortunately the people of this great city had other ideas. (more…)

I’ve just consumed a giant bowl of Ramen noodles and grilled chicken that totally filled me up, or so I thought. Until I returned to my hotel room and glanced at the room service menu. There are like four restaurants in this hotel, and you can order anything from them until 2 a.m. They advertise things like Georgia Peach Pie and gin (they totally go together). (more…)

This is a new invention to me. I’m just now working the kinks out, but I have to say it’s already changed my life. I look down upon phones that require me to pick them up and hold them to my ear. That’s sooo old school. Really, having a phone system that mutes my stereo and asks if I’d like to accept or decline a call is the only way to go. (more…)

The basement houses more than holiday decorations and litter boxes, it houses spiders and other creepy crawly things. These things could include mice and ghosts. I’ve never actually seen a ghost, but I’ve always thought the basement was the most likely place for them. (more…)

As a child, the term “Mack truck” struck terror in my heart. I didn’t know the differences between types of trucks (and still don’t), but that one sounded especially menacing. It just sounds like something that would run right over you, kind of like a Big Mac does to your stomach. (more…)

There’s the usual fear of not having your tray table in the upright and locked position, and then there’s the general anxiety attack caused by having to use a tray in everyday situations. For instance, when you eat at a fast food restaurant and they ask if this is for here or to go. And then if you say for here, they pull out a tray and pile all your artery-clogging crap on it. And then you’re sitting there with just two arms and an imbalanced tray. (more…)

It’s kind of a rule that you have to wear them with skirts and dresses in the winter. Unfortunately I don’t plan well enough ahead, and the morning that I decide to wear the pantyhose is the morning that I discover every single pair has a run. At that point I have to stick my arms through each one to determine which run will show the least. It’s typically in the crotch. (more…)

The scary thing about cleaning is discovering what is underneath all the clutter and dust. Clutter and dust is bad enough, but finding little surprises can be much worse. For instance, I decided to clear out some stuff from under my bed. I knew the cats liked to hang out there, but I didn’t know that gum had the same preference. (more…)

I’m not the most coordinated person, and that’s kind of an important quality in someone wielding a sharp object. Lots of times it looks like a slaughterhouse when I get out of the shower. There’s usually a trail of blood leading to the box of band-aids. (more…)